Grrr.

It's odd...

I know of so many things that you did to me now. For two straight months, and who knows how much longer...

But I can't stay mad at you. I really just miss you kid...
Things were good for a long time, and I think that's why I can't stay mad...
Because I keep remembering all the good things. The talks you and I had with Marcus so early in the morning. You, me, Daniel and Jeremy squishing into the truck on your moms birthday.
Your key artwork on that Sagebrush table. Picking on Daniel so bad. Cooking together. Naps. Prom. My moms birthday. Sneaking out on mothers day to come see me, even though your Mom said she had dibs for the whole day :P
Your laugh, your smile, your walk, your dance.

That look you gave me when you knew you f_cked up, and the look you gave me when you were trying to be serious for me, even though you wanted to be goofy.
You trying to lie, and not keeping a straight face.
Dying Daniels hair and Faiths tail and my nose, then almost falling asleep with the dye in.
Magic erasers. The bookstore. Refrigerators. You correcting my math and then laughing for about a week about it. Shopping. Playing with the baby stuff in Target. Spitting. Me owing you a quarter every time I cussed. Thanksgiving and Christmas 2009. Shaving cream fight. My birthday weekend. The millions of times we went into Walmart for no reason. Hours and hours spent sitting in the truck talking. About us. family. life. You hurting your foot and laughing so hard, then walking around Walmart on it and driving me home with it. And I thought you were being dramatic. Then you went and they told you it was broken :P
And everything else...
I miss all that stuff.

I get realllllllyyyyyy mad. But then I realize that the Cody I was with Jan 2010 to November 2010 wasn't the same Cody I was with until Jan 2011..
But whatever. This post has no point I suppose. I thought I had finally come to terms with the fact that you are actually gone. I still see your smile when I close my eyes..... bright as ever.

I miss you Cody James Humble....
I love you.


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